Recap from previous classes

Men we suffer from what is called the Wounded Heart. I know your heart is intact and you are just find. Well what are you hiding inside? Many of us think we are the best thing going. This makes it harder to see the real you inside. Most of us think we were born sin free and we developed our sin traits. (Romans 3:9-10 (HCSB) ⁹ What then? Are we any better? Not at all! For we have previously charged that both Jews and Gentiles are all under sin,
¹⁰ as it is written: There is no one righteous, not even one.)

We as men are drawn to what is not good. It is our nature. Jesus said we must be born again. In the process of being born again, it is impossible for man to convert himself and clean up his life. If this is true how can we consider someone before our self? We cannot unless we have truly allowed God to move within our hearts.

Romans 7:7-12 (HCSB)
⁷ What should we say then? Is the law sin? Absolutely not! On the contrary, I would not have known sin if it were not for the law. For example, I would not have known what it is to covet if the law had not said, Do not covet.
⁸ And sin, seizing an opportunity through the commandment, produced in me coveting of every kind. For apart from the law sin is dead.
⁹ Once I was alive apart from the law, but when the commandment came, sin sprang to life
¹⁰ and I died. The commandment that was meant for life resulted in death for me.
¹¹ For sin, seizing an opportunity through the commandment, deceived me, and through it killed me.
¹² So then, the law is holy, and the commandment is holy and just and good.

Did you know that in the process of Salvation there are 60 steps or phases? If you believe you the man than why did Jesus need to come as a man to save you? Stop for a minute, before you say you gave your life to Christ and you have been baptized. Think about your life since that moment. Have you given all of you life to Christ? No one can hear but God and Jesus, so be true to yourself. We all have held back from Christ a part of ourselves that we like. You know that part that still hold on to being human. (Romans 7:19-20 (NASB)
¹⁹ For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want.
²⁰ But if I am doing the very thing I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me). I didn’t mean to do, I don’t know what came over me.

We must admit that we do not spend the time we need to with God and Jesus. We must allow the Holy Spirit to correct when we are wrong and repent. We can only take the lead when we let Jesus be the Lead in our life. Then we can stand and deal the dark heart we were born into.

Knowing mother wound (Authentic Manhood)

1. The influence of the mother is one of the strongest a son will ever feel.

a. Mothers normally want the best for their sons.

b. Jesus had to deal with His mother.

c. Mary would have stop Jesus from getting on the cross.

2. Mother wound was not meant to harm but to show caring and loving affection.

a. Our mothers would never intentionally harm her children.

b. Mothers have a strong bond to her children.

c. Mother’s bond can hold on too tight.

3. Mothers wound their son by holding on too tightly to her sons. This leads to unhealthy relationship between the mother and the son.

a. This can often be seen in marriages when the mother wants give unwanted input into her son’s home.

b. Another example is when mom asks a question in the form of control.

c. This has a negative impact on the son’s relationship with his wife.

4. We must understand that mothers love their sons and would in no way hurt their son. Often mother is trying to fill-in the missing pieces. Moms just want her son to be safe and protected.

a. When the father is not around or involved in the son’s life, mom trys to fill in.

b. This is the case with many of our young men today.

c. The female – man, this looks all the part of a man but wait on the female to make the decision. Feminized man! Thinks in ways as a woman would do. Defers to the woman!

5. This is a wound of too much involvement, we as men must learn to see the wound before it destroys our lives.

a. These wounds are because men are absent. The teachers are women, the mentors are women.

b. The ignorant mom by default treats her son as a boy.

c. She wakes him in the morning, washes his clothes, and prepares his meals.

d. Needy hurting mom, dad has left so mom makes her son her husband.

e. Unwilling to release, this mom needs to control everything. She pain to a wife because the husband is still bonded to his mom.

f. Fill in the gap mom, dad isn’t around for whatever the reason. Jim Tipton.

Repair the wound:

1. Jesus is the example!

Mentoring Relationships

Authentic Manhood (Session 10)

Mentors: Paul and Timothy, Moses and Jethro, Jesus and the Twelve.

1. A Mentor is a man that has what you need. Identify your objectives in teams of needs. What are you looking to improve; knowledge, attitudes, habits, behaviors or skills. Whatever these are only the person that has developed these can help you achieve your milestones.

2. A Mentor cultivate relationship, an effective mentor must capable of giving himself to another human being. They must be capable of establishing and maintaining a relationship. Otherwise, he will have difficulty attracting anyone, despite the considerable value of what he may have to offer

3. A mentor is willing to take a chance on you. A mentor is going to make an investment in you. A mentor is going to make an investment of time, energy, emotion, trust, and resources. He may even invest cash.

4. He is respected by other men. That is important because to be the real deal others must respect you.

5. He has a network of resources. You will need to resources to help you grow.

6. He is consulted by others for guidance.

7. He both talks and listens.

8. He is consistent in his life style. All his life areas!

9. He able to see your real needs. He can see inside of you and connect.

10. He is concern with you interest.

This must be something you must want in your life not something you do to fill a box. You must what to improve your life.

You have to give back to others. We cannot live a full life until we give back. If you lived all your life taking and not giving back you are not complete. Life is a cycle and you are part of it. What is it that helped you make it in your life thus for? Is there someone you can help get to where you are?

Exodus 18:17-18 (NASB)
¹⁷ Moses' father-in-law said to him, "The thing that you are doing is not good.
¹⁸ "You will surely wear out, both yourself and these people who are with you, for the task is too heavy for you; you cannot do it alone.

This will help you in your marriage as well if you have a mentor that knows what it takes.

Ref: Authentic Manhood